{"id":2115,"date":"2020-01-14T18:38:38","date_gmt":"2020-01-14T23:38:38","guid":{"rendered":"http:\/\/bobwolff.org\/?p=2115"},"modified":"2020-01-15T09:05:05","modified_gmt":"2020-01-15T14:05:05","slug":"giving-your-all","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/bobwolff.org\/index.php\/2020\/01\/14\/giving-your-all\/","title":{"rendered":"Giving Your All…"},"content":{"rendered":"\n

I am led, unintentionally by life\nevents, to continue my last post on not being unbeatable but always being unstoppable.\nMy two grandsons had their first ever wrestling matches at a local tournament.\nThey have been wrestling for a couple of months now, but only against their teammates\nin practice; this was their first time wrestling kids they did not know, from\nother teams, other towns, in front of hundreds of people, complete with\nreferees and scoring tables. It was quite intimidating to them.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

We did not know this until we arrived,\nbut the two boys would be wrestling at different times \u2013 one in the morning and\nthe other in the afternoon, meaning the older one would have to wait over four\nhours before it was his time. But at this age the matches are quick: no longer\nthan five minutes total over the three periods (assuming one is not pinned). They\nhad three mats and wrestled two matches per mat and that kept things moving at\na good speed and before we knew it the time had come for the younger one to head\nout to the mat. He was nervous \u2013 that was immediately apparent as he\ntentatively stepped onto the mat. Although we had discussed what would happen\nand what the rules were and what to expect, his nervousness and total lack of experience\nin anything like this basically settled a veil of bewilderment and uncertainty\nover him \u2013 I could see it in his face when the whistle blew, he had absolutely\nno idea what to expect.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

As a wrestler, you can tell quite quickly what you are up against when you step on the mat; the stance, the grip in the handshake, a look in the eyes can tip you off as to whether your opponent is a formidable one or not. My boys are not there yet \u2013 they know little or nothing of reading your adversary before the match begins. But I know. And as I looked at his first opponent, I knew this would not be a gentle five minutes of rolling around on the mat like two cubs. My grandson had no idea what was coming. <\/p>\n\n\n\n

Unlike my days at his age when there were\nno such things as youth wrestling clubs, they are plentiful now with pretty much\nevery town having at least one. Kids start as early as age five, so different to\nmy age of twelve when I began. By the time they are eight, some kids have been wrestling\nfor three years whereas my grandson doesn\u2019t even have three months. And they\nshow it; they show it in their pacing around beforehand, in the aggressive\nstance they take as they prepare to start, in the way they shake their opponent\u2019s\nhand, and in how they stalk and pursue their opponent, crouched like a wild animal\npreparing to strike. <\/p>\n\n\n\n

Wrestling is an amazing sport. It requires great strength, incredible conditioning, lightning fast reflexes, speed, agility, flexibility, and coordination. At the same time it demands a strategic mind, cunning, calculating, and crafty. You need to know a wide variety of moves, when to employ them, and how to counter them when applied to you. You need to think many moves ahead, much like a chess match, planning your strategy to set up your final move to the ultimate goal \u2013 the pin. The sport requires an insane commitment to intense exercise and practice. It requires discipline and dedication to the training, the exercise, the practice, and to the diet. <\/p>\n\n\n\n

Although not at this age, wrestlers \u201csuck their weight\u201d for the season. They are paired by weight class and there is a decided advantage to being able to get your weight down to the next lower class at the time of weighing in for the match or tournament. Let\u2019s say you are normally 150 pounds; after a few weeks of intense exercise and practices, you will probably be down to 142 pounds or less. There are two classes: 145 pound or 138 pound. When you weigh in the day you will wrestle, your weight will determine which class you\u2019ll be in. Wrestling at 145 and weighing 142 will place you at a disadvantage as most kids in that class will likely weigh in around 147 or more; you are allowed to be over the weight by three pounds. But at 142 you\u2019d be too heavy for 138 given the three pound tolerance. But if you could suck your weight down a little \u2013 lose a pound or so \u2013 you could then wrestle in the 138 pound class. And you will have an advantage since by the time you wrestle several hours after weigh in, your weight will likely be back up around 145 pounds. It is just how wrestlers make themselves as competitive as possible.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

Wrestling teaches self-control, discipline, and accountability. Unlike most other team sports, the wrestlers compete alone on the mat, one on one. You win or lose your individual match based solely on your own performance (which of course, also helps or hurts the overall team score). And you are the only thing for people to watch in high school wrestling as it is done one match at a time on a single mat; and that promotes great mental toughness.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

My younger grandson went out wide eyed and nearly frozen like the proverbial deer in headlights and was down in seconds, victim to a blur of aggression and practiced confidence that was his opponent. However, he quickly shook off any surprise and bewilderment and got to the business of trying to do what he had been taught over the last couple of months. Ultimately, he lost \u2013 he was pinned. But it happened with him fighting and battling right to the bitter end. He was beaten but had not stopped trying, not stopped fighting. And I was tearfully as proud of him as a grandfather could be! He ended up wrestling two more times, losing on points after three hard fought periods in one match and getting pinned in the other. He ended up finishing 3rd<\/sup> out of four in his weight and age class and hereceived a medal.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

\"\"<\/figure><\/div>\n\n\n\n

My older grandson is ten and is deeply\ninvested in proving himself, in not being embarrassed, and in desperately\nwanting to win \u2013 he is highly competitive and passionate about everything he\ndoes. Like all humans, he simultaneously thinks he is unbeatable yet is\nterrified that he is not good enough. Hormones are already doing their thing on\nhis emotions and of them all, being male, testosterone leads the pack. He wants\nto compete, to test himself, to show off his physical prowess, and to roar. But\nhe is also insecure, scared to fail, and has no idea if all the bravado in his\nheart will ultimately translate out to anything even close to being competitive\nwith the others. <\/p>\n\n\n\n

The wait was hard for him; he had\ntrouble sleeping the night before and clearly had doubt and uncertainty on what\nto expect and getting there only to find out he and to sit and wait for four\nhours only served to amplify his nervousness. In fact his first match was probably\ncloser to five hours after our morning arrival time and when it came, he was\nwound as tightly as a guitar string. As with his brother, he ended up losing\nhis first match by being pinned. However it did not come easily to his opponent;\nhe fought like a caged tiger the whole time, getting pinned with only 2 seconds\nleft. He came back to the stands to where we were sitting and began to cry.\nTears of sorrow and of frustration and of confusion; this was nothing like he\nhad envisioned; all he knew was practice wrestling with his teammates and this\nwas not that! This was all out warfare!!<\/p>\n\n\n\n

He was better mentally prepared for\nhis second match and came a lot more aggressively and forcefully. Wrestling is\nall about control and about imposing your will on your opponent and he did just\nthat, He was leading very comfortable on points when he leveraged his opponent\nto his back and pinned him. The ref slapped the mat and blew the whistle and he\nstood up looking a little confused. The end of match routine is prescribed and\ntime honored; both athletes are to shake each other\u2019s hand, shake the referee\u2019s\nhand, shake the hand of the opposing coach, and then remove the color ID anklet\nand place it back on the mat in the center circle. He remembered a couple of\nthe steps but needed some gentle prodding from his coach to get through it all,\nso great were his emotions at that point. <\/p>\n\n\n\n

\"\"<\/figure><\/div>\n\n\n\n

He came towards me in the stands, eyes\nwide and joyous like a boy at Christmas. He found me and his smile stretched\nfrom ear to ear as he exclaimed to me, \u201cI won! I won Papa, I won!!!\u201d And then\nhe hugged me and broke down into tears\u2026tears of joy and of relief. The mantle\nof stress had been shed \u2013 he had won a match \u2013 he had passed the test and had\nproven he could win. He would not go home unvictorious, beaten by all his\nopponents and that was so important to him. And I remember that feeling and was\ninstantly brought back to the taste of the relief from my first competitive win\nand my eyes filled too. It was a rite of passage \u2013 for both of us really,\nalthough far more so for him \u2013 and it was wonderful.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

His brother is younger and wrestling\nis more of a lark to him; the hormones and tests of virility are far less important.\nThe competitive fire is not fully lit in him as is in his older brother. But\nthey both wrestled hard and they both gave their all; they brought it all and\nleft nothing behind in reserve and I was so proud. They fought every second of\nevery match and never stopped. And that is all I want for them \u2013 to be unstoppable.\n<\/p>\n\n\n\n

There is a lot of downtime in a\nwrestling tournament, up to an hour between matches for each athlete, so I had\ntime to watch a lot of matches and my greatest takeaway from seeing those boys\nand girls grappling on the mat was how so important it was to them. There were\nlots of tears; I would say form what I saw that someone cried after almost\nevery match. The emotional stakes were that high for these kids and it mattered\nthat much to them. And a huge part of that was in failing to win, but worse \u2013\ndoing so in front of their parents. Parental love and pride is viciously critical\nto children and they want so desperately to make mom and dad proud. And was thrilled\nto see how all the parents gave love and support to their kids after their\nmatches \u2013 licked their wounds so to speak. It is not unique to wrestling of\ncourse \u2013 it is with all things in life for them. But with wrestling being such\nan intense and focused sport, those emotions are forcibly brought right to the\nsurface. All in all it was an amazing day.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

So please remember dear reader, to teach\nyour children to represent themselves with integrity and pride, to treat others\nwith dignity and respect, and to be stoppable. But also please never forget how\ncrucially importantly your love, your support, and your pride in them is to\nthem. Give to them as they gave on the mat \u2013 give it all and leave nothing on\nthe table. They deserve all you have!!<\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"

I am led, unintentionally by life events, to continue my last post on not being unbeatable but always being unstoppable. My two grandsons had their first ever wrestling matches at a local tournament. They have been wrestling for a couple of months now, but only against their teammates in practice; this was their first time […]<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":1,"featured_media":2116,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"open","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"_monsterinsights_skip_tracking":false,"ocean_front_end_style_editor":"no","ocean_post_layout":"","ocean_both_sidebars_style":"","ocean_both_sidebars_content_width":0,"ocean_both_sidebars_sidebars_width":0,"ocean_sidebar":"0","ocean_second_sidebar":"0","ocean_disable_margins":"enable","ocean_add_body_class":"","ocean_shortcode_before_top_bar":"","ocean_shortcode_after_top_bar":"","ocean_shortcode_before_header":"","ocean_shortcode_after_header":"","ocean_has_shortcode":"","ocean_shortcode_after_title":"","ocean_shortcode_before_footer_widgets":"","ocean_shortcode_after_footer_widgets":"","ocean_shortcode_before_footer_bottom":"","ocean_shortcode_after_footer_bottom":"","ocean_display_top_bar":"default","ocean_display_header":"default","ocean_header_style":"","ocean_center_header_left_menu":"0","ocean_custom_header_template":"0","ocean_custom_logo":0,"ocean_custom_retina_logo":0,"ocean_custom_logo_max_width":0,"ocean_custom_logo_tablet_max_width":0,"ocean_custom_logo_mobile_max_width":0,"ocean_custom_logo_max_height":0,"ocean_custom_logo_tablet_max_height":0,"ocean_custom_logo_mobile_max_height":0,"ocean_header_custom_menu":"0","ocean_menu_typo_font_family":"0","ocean_menu_typo_font_subset":"","ocean_menu_typo_font_size":0,"ocean_menu_typo_font_size_tablet":0,"ocean_menu_typo_font_size_mobile":0,"ocean_menu_typo_font_size_unit":"px","ocean_menu_typo_font_weight":"","ocean_menu_typo_font_weight_tablet":"","ocean_menu_typo_font_weight_mobile":"","ocean_menu_typo_transform":"","ocean_menu_typo_transform_tablet":"","ocean_menu_typo_transform_mobile":"","ocean_menu_typo_line_height":0,"ocean_menu_typo_line_height_tablet":0,"ocean_menu_typo_line_height_mobile":0,"ocean_menu_typo_line_height_unit":"","ocean_menu_typo_spacing":0,"ocean_menu_typo_spacing_tablet":0,"ocean_menu_typo_spacing_mobile":0,"ocean_menu_typo_spacing_unit":"","ocean_menu_link_color":"","ocean_menu_link_color_hover":"","ocean_menu_link_color_active":"","ocean_menu_link_background":"","ocean_menu_link_hover_background":"","ocean_menu_link_active_background":"","ocean_menu_social_links_bg":"","ocean_menu_social_hover_links_bg":"","ocean_menu_social_links_color":"","ocean_menu_social_hover_links_color":"","ocean_disable_title":"default","ocean_disable_heading":"default","ocean_post_title":"","ocean_post_subheading":"","ocean_post_title_style":"","ocean_post_title_background_color":"","ocean_post_title_background":0,"ocean_post_title_bg_image_position":"","ocean_post_title_bg_image_attachment":"","ocean_post_title_bg_image_repeat":"","ocean_post_title_bg_image_size":"","ocean_post_title_height":0,"ocean_post_title_bg_overlay":0.5,"ocean_post_title_bg_overlay_color":"","ocean_disable_breadcrumbs":"default","ocean_breadcrumbs_color":"","ocean_breadcrumbs_separator_color":"","ocean_breadcrumbs_links_color":"","ocean_breadcrumbs_links_hover_color":"","ocean_display_footer_widgets":"default","ocean_display_footer_bottom":"default","ocean_custom_footer_template":"0","_jetpack_newsletter_access":"","_jetpack_dont_email_post_to_subs":false,"_jetpack_newsletter_tier_id":0,"_jetpack_memberships_contains_paywalled_content":false,"_jetpack_feature_clip_id":0,"_jetpack_memberships_contains_paid_content":false,"ocean_post_oembed":"","ocean_post_self_hosted_media":"","ocean_post_video_embed":"","ocean_link_format":"","ocean_link_format_target":"self","ocean_quote_format":"","ocean_quote_format_link":"post","ocean_gallery_link_images":"off","ocean_gallery_id":[],"footnotes":"","jetpack_post_was_ever_published":false},"categories":[5],"tags":[],"class_list":["post-2115","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","has-post-thumbnail","hentry","category-humanity","entry","has-media"],"yoast_head":"\nGiving Your All... - Through the Eyes of a Wolff<\/title>\n<meta name=\"robots\" content=\"index, follow, max-snippet:-1, max-image-preview:large, max-video-preview:-1\" \/>\n<link rel=\"canonical\" href=\"https:\/\/bobwolff.org\/index.php\/2020\/01\/14\/giving-your-all\/\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:locale\" content=\"en_US\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:type\" content=\"article\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:title\" content=\"Giving Your All... - Through the Eyes of a Wolff\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:description\" content=\"I am led, unintentionally by life events, to continue my last post on not being unbeatable but always being unstoppable. My two grandsons had their first ever wrestling matches at a local tournament. They have been wrestling for a couple of months now, but only against their teammates in practice; this was their first time […]\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:url\" content=\"https:\/\/bobwolff.org\/index.php\/2020\/01\/14\/giving-your-all\/\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:site_name\" content=\"Through the Eyes of a Wolff\" \/>\n<meta property=\"article:published_time\" content=\"2020-01-14T23:38:38+00:00\" \/>\n<meta property=\"article:modified_time\" content=\"2020-01-15T14:05:05+00:00\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:image\" content=\"https:\/\/bobwolff.org\/wp-content\/uploads\/2020\/01\/wrestling.jpg\" \/>\n\t<meta property=\"og:image:width\" content=\"277\" \/>\n\t<meta property=\"og:image:height\" content=\"182\" \/>\n\t<meta property=\"og:image:type\" content=\"image\/jpeg\" \/>\n<meta name=\"author\" content=\"Bob Wolff\" \/>\n<meta name=\"twitter:card\" content=\"summary_large_image\" \/>\n<meta name=\"twitter:creator\" content=\"@Wolff162\" \/>\n<meta name=\"twitter:site\" content=\"@Wolff162\" \/>\n<meta name=\"twitter:label1\" content=\"Written by\" \/>\n\t<meta name=\"twitter:data1\" content=\"Bob Wolff\" \/>\n\t<meta name=\"twitter:label2\" content=\"Est. reading time\" \/>\n\t<meta name=\"twitter:data2\" content=\"10 minutes\" \/>\n<script type=\"application\/ld+json\" class=\"yoast-schema-graph\">{\"@context\":\"https:\\\/\\\/schema.org\",\"@graph\":[{\"@type\":\"Article\",\"@id\":\"https:\\\/\\\/bobwolff.org\\\/index.php\\\/2020\\\/01\\\/14\\\/giving-your-all\\\/#article\",\"isPartOf\":{\"@id\":\"https:\\\/\\\/bobwolff.org\\\/index.php\\\/2020\\\/01\\\/14\\\/giving-your-all\\\/\"},\"author\":{\"name\":\"Bob Wolff\",\"@id\":\"https:\\\/\\\/bobwolff.org\\\/#\\\/schema\\\/person\\\/8c85922d8561235810cd93980568a500\"},\"headline\":\"Giving Your All…\",\"datePublished\":\"2020-01-14T23:38:38+00:00\",\"dateModified\":\"2020-01-15T14:05:05+00:00\",\"mainEntityOfPage\":{\"@id\":\"https:\\\/\\\/bobwolff.org\\\/index.php\\\/2020\\\/01\\\/14\\\/giving-your-all\\\/\"},\"wordCount\":1943,\"commentCount\":80,\"publisher\":{\"@id\":\"https:\\\/\\\/bobwolff.org\\\/#\\\/schema\\\/person\\\/8c85922d8561235810cd93980568a500\"},\"image\":{\"@id\":\"https:\\\/\\\/bobwolff.org\\\/index.php\\\/2020\\\/01\\\/14\\\/giving-your-all\\\/#primaryimage\"},\"thumbnailUrl\":\"https:\\\/\\\/bobwolff.org\\\/wp-content\\\/uploads\\\/2020\\\/01\\\/wrestling.jpg\",\"articleSection\":[\"The Human Side\"],\"inLanguage\":\"en-US\",\"potentialAction\":[{\"@type\":\"CommentAction\",\"name\":\"Comment\",\"target\":[\"https:\\\/\\\/bobwolff.org\\\/index.php\\\/2020\\\/01\\\/14\\\/giving-your-all\\\/#respond\"]}]},{\"@type\":\"WebPage\",\"@id\":\"https:\\\/\\\/bobwolff.org\\\/index.php\\\/2020\\\/01\\\/14\\\/giving-your-all\\\/\",\"url\":\"https:\\\/\\\/bobwolff.org\\\/index.php\\\/2020\\\/01\\\/14\\\/giving-your-all\\\/\",\"name\":\"Giving Your All... - 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My two grandsons had their first ever wrestling matches at a local tournament. 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